Headline: Minnesotan Travelled in Spain

There is nothing equal to world travel, to inspire my interest in food again. Ten days in Spain, cooking lessons from the best of home chefs, and lovely meals with new friends... it was all very eventful and memorable for me. First, gazpacho. In Spain, I met at least 5 really good cooks. I tasted gazpacho from 3 of them. I don't know what was their secret, but it was so much better than the gazpacho I make at home. Do you have to be a Spaniard to make really good gazpacho? Quiza. It's the same recipe! What is it that makes the gazpacho in Spain taste so wonderful that a shot glass full of it as a tapa is enough to satisfy? I investigated. And, I came up with the only possible answer: the vinegar. It must be the specific type of vinegar that makes that concoction irresistible. I asked; they said, "Wine vinegar." Alas.

Vegan?

I have been out of the blogosphere for a few months. I haven't felt like writing. My cooking became very banal and un-noteworthy. I gave in to hot dogs, sliced apples, tiny apple sauce containers, canned olives, and canned oranges for my kid. She went from an adventurous eater to a bland eater (as kids do), and I just gave in.

For myself and my husband, I stopped cooking almost altogether. The weather here has had a huge impact on my attitude. Making food is a chore, and in the spring & summer I want to devote myself to more fun pursuits (like laying around).

We were in Oregon for his family reunion the week before last. We were treated to a very special anniversary party for Ted & Harriet, a couple that has been a cornerstone for many area families. They ran an adoption agency for most of their adult life, and themselves adopted countless kids, who now have kids of their own. Their 50th wedding anniversary was especially sweet and touching because they both have a different form of cancer. And, the party was in a barn.

It was catered by vegan caterers (though not all the food was vegan), and naturally, talk turned to eating styles. It's very interesting listening to people talk about this topic. It's a more passion-filled discussion than talking about politics or raising children. I love it. It's like, when a person makes a decision to conform to a diet that isn't the norm, people feel compelled to question it. And they even act like it's some freaky thing. Like vegans are freaks.

So I questioned myself: What is it about the vegan diet that turns me off? Is it:

1) That vegans seem so righteous
2) No cheese
3) Way too much tofu and tempeh
4) Too difficult to make food taste good without the aid of animal fat?

Well, I decided I had to find out. So I have been to the library, and have vegan cookbooks. I am going to look into this. I want to expand my diet, not limit it. There is no way I'm giving up cheese as a matter of principal, nor for health. No way.

Please stay tuned.

What's The Opposite of Green?

Have you heard about these families that decide to "go green" for a year or so? They stop driving their cars, attempt to not use any kind of fuel for anything, grow their own veg, and maybe, I don't know, wear dirty clothes every day? Anyway, I have been thinking. Instead of "going green" for a year, I might just try going the opposite of green for a month. Like a vacation from giving a shit about the planet. This would take a lot of pressure off of me, I think. Here's what I plan to do:

Use paper for everything: paper plates, plastic forks, everything disposable. Lots of trash, no dishes to wash or put away.

My daughter and I would wear just a few outfits that will get washed all the time.

Showers twice a day.

Cleaning the house with the most powerful, harshest chemicals I can find (I'll need help on this one -- I don't know anything about the products that will actually work on soap scum, pit stains, and odor. Except Rachel told me that Fabreeze actually works!)

After a long, long, cold winter, using a lot of Miracle Gro on whatever I plant. Yes, I will still plant flowers and vegetables. And I will buy a lot of them too.

Dinner: hot dogs, instant meals, microwave popcorn.

Actually, this is sounding like a really bad idea.

Don't Be Scared

Midwestern food can be challenging for an east coast/west coast foodie. I understand those challenges, but please, open your mind.

There's a little cafe in Longfellow that serves basic food to people who eat basic food. Meat, potatoes, and gravy for lunch. The one time I was there, the clientele was senior citizens who go there to have lunch and converse with friends. It was very midwestern, and if you don't get it, well, you are missing out on seeing the beauty of that.

I ordered a barbecued pulled pork sandwich, and it came with blue cheese cole slaw. I just HAD to try the cole slaw.

"I'm sorry. We're out of the ingredients to make cole slaw today. I can give you a substitute," said the waitron. Oh, no! Oh, well. That's okay.

Then, a few minutes later, "It turns out, we DO have the ingredients to make the cole slaw, if you still want it."

"Oh, yes. Yes, please! I want to try the cole slaw!" I kid you not, this is how I act in a restaurant.

I was there with my daughter, my mom, and my dad. Now, my mom and I eat this cole slaw often. Maybe it's our Danish roots (blue cheese, anyone?), maybe it's our Minnesota roots (milkfat, please).


BLUE CHEESE COLE SLAW: Sliced/chopped cabbage, blue cheese, mayonnaise, salt & pepper.

Soup IS Good Food!*

Soup. I just love the word. Soup. My acupuncturist once told me that the Chinese view of the stomach is that it is like a big pot of soup. She was advising me against cold drinks. "You wouldn't put ice cubes in a big pot of warm soup, would you?" That's logical.

I'm thinking about becoming a soup specialist. But I don't find that many good recipes. I mostly stick to the standards: fresh tomato soup, chicken noodle soup, and vichyssoise. At this point in my life, I can hardly stand canned soup.

Please tell me about your favorite soup. I want to know.


*A note to the Campbell's Soup Company: Please don't sue me for using your slogan. Thank you.

Fish Soup

This soup is delightful, and easy to make. Serves 2-3 people.

Ingredients:

4 T butter
1/2 onion, chopped
2 medium potatoes, peeled & diced
thyme
water
3 c. milk (or cream)
2-3 fillets of white fish

Procedure:

Melt butter in soup pot. Saute chopped onions until transparent.
Add diced potatoes. Saute for 1-2 minutes.
Add fresh or dried thyme.* Stir.
Add water to cover, enough to completely cook the potatoes. Boil lightly for about 10 minutes.
Gently stir in milk, a little at a time, and simmer until hot enough to cook fish.
Add 2-inch pieces of fish, and cook about 3 minutes.

If you use cream this dish will be decidedly richer, and probably better as a side dish than a complete meal. (Great for an appetizer to impress dinner guests!) Otherwise, dilute soup with milk to reach the consistency that appeals to you.

Serve with toast.

*When using fresh thyme in soups, bundle twigs and tie together, then remove when the soup is ready to serve. Dried thyme can more accurately be measured in pinches, to please your palate.

I'm a big herb freak, so I use a lot of dried thyme in this delicious soup.

Why Chinese New Year?

It has replaced Halloween as my favorite holiday of the year. It has been my favorite since I decided to adopt a daughter from China. Here are the reasons that I love Chinese New Year, and why I think you should celebrate it too.

Chinese New Year (CNY), also known as the Lunar New Year, and Spring Festival, is celebrated just the right amount of time after the Christmas holidays. I've had enough time to chill out, relax, and plan for the next fun event. It doesn't require presents, just red clothes and a haircut. The decorations and rituals are simple and simply beautiful: fresh flowers, red banners, red lanterns, and oranges. It brightens a late January/early February like Christmas lights do December, except better, because at Christmas, it really is the darkest time of the year, and right now we are better able to anticipate spring.

The food is unbelievably good (see previous post), and easy to make. I downloaded traditional Chinese music and spent Sunday morning in my kitchen, in meditation as I made preparations. I felt calm, loving, and hungry when my feast was ready to serve (this is not always the case when preparing a special meal for extended family, am I right?). We finished most of the food, because it was just the right amount, and when we wanted more dumplings, daughter and grandmother headed to the kitchen to make more. That act alone made my day. I swell with pride and love knowing my daughter likes to create in the kitchen with her grandparents. Just that makes me think that everything will be all right, forever.

Also, the crafts are fun. Dragons and animals. This year we made dragon masks and bunny ears (year of the rabbit) at preschool. See our bunny ears in photo above. They can do double-duty at Easter.

The pressure is too much for me on January 1st. By the end of January, I'm ready to move forward in the new year and take seriously some spiritual renewal. Maybe the lunar calendar is more suited to the rhythm of my life.

Happy Chinese New Year!

MENU:

Appetizers -- fresh cut vegetables with peanut sauce. My mother ("Laolao") will be providing the dip, because her's is SO GOOD.

Dumplings -- everyone in the family participates in making the dumplings. In past postings, I have deprecated myself and my dumplings, but I'll tell you now, they are damn good! Reference "Joy of Cooking" for a recipe.

Noodles -- signifying long life. In China some people celebrate individual birthdays during the year, and some don't. On Chinese New Year, it's everyone's birthday. This year's noodles will be pan-fried or oven-roasted vegetarian lo mein noodles.

Mr. Chang's Chicken -- this recipe was gathered by Ruth Reichl the first time she visited China. The chicken is boiled in a broth of soy sauce, sugar, star anise, ginger, licorice root, and mandarin orange peel.

Bok Choy -- a nutritious vegetable symbolizing the coming of spring. Simmered in ginger broth, and served with oyster sauce.

Tea Eggs -- hard-boiled eggs soaked in tea, star anise, and soy sauce. Symbolizing rebirth and new things to come, tea eggs are eaten first in the feast. These always seem weird to the uninitiated, but everybody likes them. You should try them. Here is the recipe:

TEA EGGS -- A specialty for Chinese New Year

12 eggs, hard boiled
1 cup soy sauce
4 t salt
12 star anise pods
12 black tea bags

Gently crack the shells of the eggs all over by tapping them with the back of a spoon but do not remove the shells. Put them in a large nonreactive saucepan with the soy sauce, salt, star anise, and enough water to just cover the eggs, about 8 cups. Tie the tea bags together and place them in the pan with the eggs.

Bring to a boil over high heat. Reduce the heat and simmer gently, covered, about 12 minutes. Turn off the heat and set the pan aside. Let cool to room temperature, covered. Refrigerate the eggs overnight in their cooking mixture before serving.

From: Modern Asian Flavors, A Taste of Shanghai, by Richard Wong, 2005.

Dessert? Well, those close to me know that I don't do dessert. But I will be serving the most fantastic dessert ever invented, in my opinion. I discovered it at CostCo.

I could live on noodles and sorbet.

Energy Shortage -- Learning to Cut Back

When fuel prices soar, we find ways to save money, such as wearing long underwear in the house, driving less, and spending less $ on food. It's the logical process of dealing with the economic downturn.

When our bodies are low on energy, the body economizes by getting sick. A bad cold this month has taught me, or rather reminded me, to slow down and conserve energy. January is a tough month in the Midwest. We just came off the whirlwind of holidays -- shopping, overeating, and celebrating. We feel we must keep going. We must get stuff done! For some reason, perhaps it is our American life, we find it disconcerting to be still, even when there is ANOTHER snow storm, and ANOTHER cold snap of zero degree weather. In our culture, it is hard for us to STOP.

As cliche as this sounds, listen to the body. Yes, I know, the body & mind & spirit together all are experiencing cabin fever. There are remedies for that. But if you can't go to Mexico this year, you'll have to use cheaper remedies. Here are some suggestions...

1) Put some really pumping music in your car... do car chair dancing and singing at the top of your lungs while driving.

2) Dance in the house -- arms overhead! Really go for it! With abandon!

3) Play outside even though it is really, really cold.

For obtaining seasonal balance, I suggest...

1) Read books that you can actually devour. That means entertaining books, not intellectual stuff that makes you smarter.

2) Be crafty. Do a tedious craft you would never want to do in the summer. Something using hot glue. Or perhaps drawing straight lines until you can actually draw a straight line. Repetition is key.

3) If you really need something that is creative, productive, and can be done while seated, write letters to your friends. Write letters to your congress members. Become an armchair activist.

It's all about balance.


FRENCH ONION SOUP
Saute 2-3 large sweet onions in butter & olive oil. Add beef stock.
Serve with grated gruyere cheese on top, and crusty french bread.


HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!
YEAR OF THE RABBIT BEGINS FEBRUARY 3
Shopkeepers in China hang lettuce upside-down at their entrances. When the lion dancers parade down the streets, or hutongs, they climb up to grab the lettuce, ensuring an abundant spring.

Community Cooks

Will I start making easy speed-scratch meals? As my child grows, and our lives get even more busy & complicated, will I start making the meals advertised by Swanson on television?

A university, any university -- how about the U of M -- should have students making a study about 40-something adoptive parents. The study should include how they feed their children. After years of making super-conscious meal decisions, with time to cook and appreciate food (plus cleaning up, while drinking wine), how now, do us 40-something parents feed their families? Perhaps you don't care, but it is interesting to me.

A few years ago, my peers were indignant of food establishment Boston Market. It's a liberal thing: isn't it so terrible that women are picking up pre-made meals instead of cooking the full meal at home... this is the destruction of American society... women who don't cook homemade food are immoral... how dare Boston Market try to capitalize on busy families... etc. etc. Oh, wait, is that liberals or conservatives? I get them confused sometimes.

When I think about homes in other cultures/countries, I see a lot of meals prepared outside the home, and what's wrong with that? It's part of what makes a community. We ought to rely on community folks who cook great meals at great prices, for us, to ease our burden. I wish my neighborhood had more take-out restaurants that I could trust and afford. HOLY LAND is one great place to get a pre-cooked meal, and their chickens are cage-free. It is more economical for us to get a rotisserie chicken from them than for me to cook one myself. THAT's what I'm talkin' about.

Why aren't there more places like that in Minneapolis, Minnesota? My answer is: it's just too cold. It might not make sense to you, but that is the reason we don't have great take-out. It's just too cold.

I propose a new movement by Minneapolitans who want to make a good buck: follow Holy Land's model. Make us some good, wholesome, reasonably-priced take-out food. And before you send me a message that I should do it, I'll tell you right now that I love cooking too much to do it every day, for money. It's just not for me.

The problem with Boston Market is that it was a chain, and therefore associated with capitalism ('cause capitalism is a bad thing... ???). I get it. I want my take-out to have at least the feel of home-made food, like Holy Land. Holy Land is now very successful and national, with a wonderful place in the Midtown Global Market. I don't know how they do it; I don't know how they get all those free-range chickens and abuse-free meats. I'm not an investigator; I simply trust them. They are fast becoming part of a large capitalist market that I'm sure liberals won't like. So, someone has to step up and offer us some of the same, with the local trust we have come to love so much.

If that is you, please offer duck and pheasant. Thank you.

Tortilla de Patate, otra vez

I am working on a new post about Momofuku, but it is taking some time & energy. In the mean time, I encourage you to revisit this recipe from Carmen, if you are looking for something to make for dinner or lunch.

Celebrity Chef David Chang

Very rarely is there a male celebrity who makes me swoon like a teenager. Some of my past loves have been: Fred Astaire, Rod Stewart, and Leonardo DiCaprio. Also Vince D'Onofrio, in certain roles. I hesitate to write about my new smittenly love, David Chang. My younger self would've probably become his groupie and followed him around begging him to love me, even though he was a total asshole. I am now old enough to know better. (Plus, he is much younger than I, so it's just weird to be thinking of him that way. I'm more comfortable having carnal thoughts about Patrick Stewart.)

If the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, the way to MY heart is through noodle. I fell in love with David Chang because his passion in life was noodles. He sought out noodles in Japan, as many people do, with a singular passion. I admire this quest in ways I cannot express, because it is a thing deep inside my soul. I know it's goofy, and it sounds pretty stupid coming from a Midwest farmer's granddaughter, but David Chang's story appeals to me on many levels. Three of the levels are 1) obsession with noodles, 2) aimlessly trying to figure out what to do in life, and 3) travel based mostly on eating cultural delicacies.

I had vaguely encountered Momofuku by surfing the 'net about food. It was when I was armed with a gift card at Barnes & Noble that I saw the book, "Momofuku," and had the means to buy it. It is part memoir, part cookbook, part photography, and part comical. I so admired the book that I stayed with a cashier for at least 15 minutes while he tried to take the smudge off the cover, couldn't, and then called other stores to see if they had a pristine copy, which I then drove all the way across town, from St. Louis Park to St. Paul, to buy. It's sounds silly, I know, but it is so neat to find a restauranteur and food lover who cares about simple noodles. During that 15 minutes, I watched a woman lose her misbehaved child, helped her look for him, witnessed some near-abuse followed by gift-buying for said child, and saw a homeless guy kicked out of the store. Good times! Just being-in-waiting has its rewards. Cultural entertainment is all around you.

Back to Momofuku. You have to read the story to know where the name comes from. The short version is that it's the name of the guy who invented packaged ramen noodles. What a cool legacy that is! Anyway, crazy David Chang, who has few friends willing to go into business with him, opened a noodle bar in NY, called "Noodle Bar," which was quite close to failing, and now he has at least 5 restaurants that are beloved darlings of New Yorkers. He is famous. He was on the David Letterman show. And he's super-cute (you know, in a younger-brother sort of way). One of my favorite stories from the book is how he describes his marketing plan for Noodle Bar: he brought lots of money to a strip club full of Japanese female strippers, paid for lap dances and gave them his Noodle Bar business card, figuring that if he filled his restaurant with hot Japanese women, the clientele would follow. Hee-hee! Sexploitation aside, that's genius, you have to admit.

What impresses me so much about Momofuku is the simplicity of the menus. Noodle Bar opened with a few versions of noodles and pickled vegetables. Beverages were severely limited. Exchange was cash only. I think that restaurants often have WAY too many things on the menu. In other cases, too few (Craftsman, take note). When I go to a restaurant it is an event, and I want to know, at least in part, what I'm about to put into my mouth. I don't want oodles of flourishing descriptions to read about the main course; I rely on my waitron to clue me in on the details. When I read one of those descriptions, I ask the waitron, "So, what does it TASTE like?" Hello! Please don't go on and on and on about tarragon-infused blah blah blah... you know? Speaking of blah blah blah... there I go again off on a tangent.

Now David Chang is rich & famous, and his restaurants are hard to get into. Oh, well. Here is a recipe from the book, which is so simple and so enlightened.

BUTTERMILK DRESSING
makes 1/2 cup

Whisk together:

1/2 cup buttermilk
2 1/2 T sour cream
scant 1/2 t kosher salt, or more if needed
generous 1/4 t sriracha (rooster sauce), or more if needed

In the book, this is served with raw fluke, soy & poppy seeds. When he invented the dressing, he and his staff ate it on leftover baked potatoes. That is pretty darn good. WAY better than ranch dressing on potatoes.

In the coming months of darkness, I will be adding sunshine to my world by cooking from the inspiration of David Chang. Look for more neat ideas. Also, Chinese New Year is coming on February 3rd, and I will be creating another fabulous feast that will include egg rolls, which I just made all by myself. And they are way better than what you can get in a restaurant. Also a future post about paladares.

Dump Soup

The photos above were taken this morning, and Ariel inspired this post. She brought a variety of things to my bed (a ball, some blocks, paper, toys) and told me she was making soup. Things kept being added to the soup, and stirred. Also, a photo of my pantry, which is right now totally random and messy.

I learned this recipe from a music teacher I worked with when I was teaching in the public schools. She was an unusual woman, a big woman, not exactly fat (although she did talk about Weight Watchers points during lunch every day), just large and intense. She was older than me, lived alone and was concentrating on earning her Masters in Education. Her thesis was on the power of music education in increasing math test scores. She was so passionate about her vocation, that while teaching a roomful of disrespectful, wild, obnoxious kids, her enthusiasm made her sweat profusely.

I liked her a lot, and she was very smart, if a tad socially inept. The kind of person I enjoy working with, but wouldn't really want to hang out with. You know what I mean. When she told me about Dump Soup, I admit I thought it was sort of low-class. I was a bit of a food snob at that time. Nevertheless, I tried it and loved it!


The DUMP SOUP recipe is this: Dump 5 cans of stuff from the pantry into a large pot on the stove. Cook until hot enough to eat.


This is my preferred Dump Soup:

1 can dark red kidney beans
1 can tomatoes
1 can corn
1 can green beans
1 can chicken broth

These days, I don't keep canned corn or green beans or chicken stock in my pantry, so I have to improvise. As always, I'm not going to tell you how to improvise, because I know y'all know how to cook!

I know you don't believe me; I'm telling you: it's good! One time a few winters ago, we had a visitor stop by on a 3-hour layover. I had no time to make something elegant and fabulous for my foodie food snob friend, so I made Dump Soup and didn't tell him what it was. And by god to hell, he loved it! He said it was PERFECT! So, modestly I said, "Oh, I just whipped this up," like, "Oh, this old thing? I just threw this on." And it was true!

Dear readers, that visitor was one of YOU. Do you remember?

The moral of the story is: the flavor of food is about perception. Surrounded by loving friends and family, food can always taste exquisite. Especially if it is pretend food.

Favorite New Products

Have you tried my Sexy Smoked Salmon Sandwich? I've been eating it frequently since that post, with modifications. I love mixing wasabi mayonnaise from this little can of wasabi powder, and I use it instead of dijon mustard in many things. Goes great with fish!

Some of my readers don't like mayonnaise. Well, that just sucks for you.

Some recent time ago, I had some alone time to shop at the famous Mall of America. I purchased some much-needed boots. Then I was allowed more time alone at the famous Mall of America. There is a great kitchen store there, where I always find something I didn't know I needed. I got this little vegetable scrubber gadget that hooks onto my finger. The bristles are good and stiff, and it is SO comfortable. Great for potatoes.

One of my readers just LOVES potatoes. This gadget is for YOU.

Also at that store I found honeycomb silicone pot holders that are pliable, and dishwasher safe! I love those things!

It's been a while since I bought the lucky elephant salt & pepper shakers, but I still love them every day. Some of my readers think that goofy salt & pepper shakers are really nerdy. If that's you, well, you didn't have an Aunt Minnie who had a collection of character salt & pepper shakers, that were kept in a glass case. I did. I admired that collection with awe. Unfortunately, it was not passed down in the family.

Don't Mess With Thanksgiving!

Leafing through my food magazines this month I found all sorts of extravagant gourmet ideas for Thanksgiving. At the ripe old age of 43, I have settled down to this one very important and basic understanding of Thanksgiving dinner: we all want to eat the same thing every single year. Here is what we want:

Turkey -- a very large bird, oven-cooked, hopefully with moisture in the meat. Please present the bird whole, because that's how you celebrate thanks to the bird whose life was sacrificed.

Stuffing -- sure, go ahead and try your variations, but we really just want something quite close in taste to Stove Top.

Gravy -- made from the turkey meat juices.

Mashed Potatoes -- sans garlic.

Vegetables -- green bean casserole (the recipe invented by the Campbell's soup company, not your fresh version with homemade bechamel), cauliflower & cheese casserole, and also something whipped & orange (yams and/or squash).

Other great additions are cranberry sauce, jello, and a fresh green salad with vinaigrette. I like lots of pomegranate seeds too. They make a meal totally festive.

I feel very certain in this proclamation this year, because I have learned about tasting research you might find interesting. It turns out that tasting enjoyment is almost completely psychological. In a beautiful setting, especially if surrounded with love, food will be delicious. You will not know that your mashed potatoes came from a box. If you believe the mashed potatoes are homemade, they will taste that way. The distortion of reality is quite fascinating, is it not?

Maybe that could take some of the pressure off of holiday meals. Please, dear readers, relax, make the Thanksgiving basics, have a glass of wine, and enjoy the love that surrounds you.

For more on the psychology of tasting, read Laura Esquivel, author of "Like Water for Chocolate." "Between Two Fires" is one of my favorite books.

The Rant About American Media and Consumerism

I took a non-fiction writing class at The Loft a few years ago. One of the aspects of non-fiction writing was The Rant. I love to rant about the media. Here ensues a rant.

There is a TV in my kitchen. Unfortunately, during most cooking hours there is nothing on TV (we don't have cable). I was watching the local news while cooking dinner this evening. A reporter came on to tell about a study that somehow predicts that Americans are going to shop this year, for Christmas. The newscaster responds with, "That IS good news," and the reporter goes, "Yes, it is." Then he goes on to report on this whatever made-up study, and says, "This is the KEY to the holiday season."

Well, I had to switch off the television and rant out loud to my husband about how much I hate local news, because, really? That's the KEY to our economic woes? Shopping?? And here I thought that Americans were getting a dose of reality with all the foreclosures and excessive debt, and that we are shopping LESS, in order to preserve what we have. What's that blues song? "I don't want anything for Christmas, I just want to keep what I have."

Don't take me the wrong way. I like shopping. I like buying stuff, like any red-blooded American. (Where did that term "red-blooded American" come from anyway?) The thing is, if you read this blog, and any other mlogs (that's mom-blog, in case you didn't know), it's apparent that red-blooded American women are DIY-ing it in every arena of life, including Christmas gifts. I could probably point to half of my readers who would prefer my home-grown, home-pickled green beans to anything I could buy at a store. Am I right? The difference is that those pickled beans are a product of hard work, and they are made with love. I can see it in the recipient's eyes: love.

When the DIY-ers are reported on in the media, it's like, quaint. Like, isn't it quaint how she pickles beans or sews children's clothes or knits hats & mittens? Isn't it so cute & quaint? And oh, the money-saving part of it... well, whatever. It's like they are saying, we all know that overworked moms do this kind of shit to have a creative outlet to make them feel better about themselves. And isn't it cute? Something to admire, to be sure. But obviously a throw-back to "more simpler times," in a romantic way.

What's my point? you want to know. I don't really have one. But if I must sharpen it, I will say that I'm just so mad at our terrible news media. I said to my husband, "What gives them the right to say it's good news that people are going to shop?"

I must tell you that I recently watched "What Would Jesus Buy?" on Netflix. It's a documentary about The Church of Stop Shopping, starring Reverend Billy. I thought it would be a knee-jerk liberal reaction to consumerism, so I had low expectations, but it was heart-warming and funny. Reverend Billy is an actor, but he actually takes his message to the people very seriously. His choir is 100% behind him, and it's a beautiful thing to watch. They stage events where he preaches to the people, "Stop shopping!" And then he gets arrested.

I didn't grow green beans this year. I didn't pickle green beans this year. I don't know what gifts I will be giving to the people I care about. I have made one decision: I am giving up the "green" wrapping, and I am trading it in for shiny expensive paper and luxury ribbons. Because I do know one thing: it's not only the thought that counts, it's the presentation.

I Can Do It, Yes I Can!

I made a pot-luck dish that was completely gone, and I got to take home an empty Pyrex! People, I made a pot-luck dish that got completely eaten. I am telling you the truth. Me. I did that.

How? you say, How? did I, Jocinda, the health nut, make a pot-luck dish that got completely eaten? Well, I will tell you. I googled "potluck dishes" and "casserole recipes." Yeah, dude, the Internet. I used it, and I used it well.

The problem with being a health nut is that most people do not prefer your food. Yes, you. Your food. It's too healthy, too good for you, too "green" (or brown, as the case may be). Food needs fat, salt, and sugar. Fat in the form of dairy (cheese + cream + butter), sugar in any form, and salt in any form, but mostly table salt. Have you ever eaten "Ambrosia Salad?" I rest my case. (BTW if you have never had Ambrosia Salad, then you have a cultural deficit.)

I don't make casseroles because they always have some form of lactose, and my DH is lactose intolerant. Pot-lucks, in general, can be a smorgasbord of lactose-laden foods. "That was super-lactosen," as DH would say. And then we go home with gas.

However, being stumped with how to provide for the pre-school co-op pot-luck last Wednesday, I googled and came up with this recipe. Which was, did I mention? ALL EATEN.

What's it called again? Oh, yeah...


CHEESY RANCH POTATO BAKE

4 lbs potatoes (I used 7 potatoes, because I couldn't stand the idea of only 4 potatoes swimming in the lactose)

1/2 t salt (totally unnecessary)

2 t chilli pepper - that's a lot!

6 T butter - what???!!! No! Don't do that!

8 oz pkg pre-shredded colby-jack cheese

8 oz bottle Ranch dressing


Sounds easy, right? It totally is! Okay, so, pre-heat the oven to 400 degrees F. Cube the potatoes real small, like, 1/2 inch dice. And I love this direction: "Lightly grease a 9x13inch casserole dish." Lightly! Don't overdo it! Place potatoes, salt, and chilli powder in dish, dot with butter, cover with tin foil, and bake for 1 hour.

By now my mouth is totally watering from the fragrance of these chilli-bake potatoes. I swear to you, it felt like sacrilege adding the lactosen stuff. So next time, I am just going to eat these blessed potatoes by themselves. Anyway, you take out the dish and mix in the remaining ingredients, cook for 10 minutes. Oui La!

Link, you ask?

Bonus for readers: count the hyphens in this post and receive a special prize from me!

Sexy Smoked Salmon Sandwich

This sandwich is so good, I forgot to photograph it before I chowed it down.

Toast English muffins to your preferred crispness.
Layer on preferred amount of sliced smoked salmon (lox).
Spoon dressing on top of salmon.
Add preferred greens (e.g. arugula, watercress, frisee, mesclun).

Dressing:
Mayonnaise, dijon mustard, dried dill.

Let the Sky Rain Potatoes

M.F.K. Fisher is an American icon of food writing. I know very little about her, having just discovered her. She lived from 1908-1992, in California and France. Despite her pedigree, she was a very down-to-earth person when it came to food. She reminds me a little bit of Arianna Huffington. Someone who has the privileges of the rich, yet remains an advocate for the less rich. Rare.

M.F.K. wrote about potatoes more than once. At first, it seemed she despised the tuber, because it was served unceremoniously at every meal of her childhood. Meat & potatoes, meat & potatoes, meat & potatoes. Later, she wrote about its discovery. The glorious discovery of the potato, and then the monarchy that pushed its edibility on the poor, who then starved to death when the potato curated its own disease. And then later, she wrote about the wonder of the potato, describing its fluffiness with a sensuality I will probably never achieve on this blog.

Let me try to tell you about my own experience of potatoes, and then give you a new recipe.

My first intense potato experience was when I had my wisdom teeth out, at about age 13. All I wanted to eat was mashed potatoes, soft enough with cream & butter to be practically put through a straw. That magical food saved my life. I didn't want to die as long as I had mashed potatoes, with black pepper. I think there is somewhere a picture of me in bed recovering, with an almost-smile on my face, only because of mashed potatoes.

Years later, I tried to understand how to cook potatoes. My, my, my... they are hard to cook. Consider the varieties. I read "The Man Who Ate Everything" by Jeffrey Steingarten, who, in journalistic fashion, tried to master potato cooking, and dissected the starch content down to a science. It confused me more.

DH prefers long-cooked oven baked potatoes with thick skins. I prefer fresh red potatoes boiled softly.

My friend, who was a chef at the Modern Cafe for years, told me that he can easily cook gnocchi. "Oh, my!" I said, "Gnocchi is easy?"

"Yes, totally easy," he said. And then he went into all the complications of picking the proper potato. He warned me about farmer's market potatoes (too fresh), and of grocery store potatoes (too old). After a few minutes of this, I was tuning out. Because really, how can you know a proper potato for gnocchi? Please, spare me.


POTATOES WITH ROSEMARY & GARLIC

In a pan, heat olive oil.
Add diced potatoes.
Saute, adding a lot of rosemary and fresh crushed garlic, and of course, salt. Cover the pan and cook, stirring ocassionaly, for however long it takes, because as I've said before, I know y'all know how to cook!

It is an oily dish, but delicious!

I love potatoes, so much. Today at the grocery store I perused all the frozen types of potatoes, and I was totally grossed out. Let's just review a few of the grossest things available for purchase.

sweet potato fries
hash browns
tater tots
potato pancakes

None of these are good food. Even though I am a mom who wants desperately to make food more instant, I cannot, will not, serve this crap to my kid. And neither should you.

Except once in a while.